God 2.0

I've heard several times that the old testament is old news. Let's focus, then, on the new testament in the bible. It's the new and improved word of God.

(1 Corinthians 11:5) But every woman praying or prophesying with her head unveiled dishonoureth her head: for it is one and the same thing as if she were shaven. (6) For if a woman is not veiled, let her also be shorn: but if it is a shame to a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be veiled.

I've never been to a christian church where women covered their heads.

(1 Timothy 2:11) Let a woman learn in quietness with all subjection. (12) But I permit not a woman to teach, nor to have dominion over a man, but to be in quietness.

Your new testament still hates women. How else could this be translated, I wonder? I've been sitting here trying to think of a way to spin it, but I can't.

(2 Timothy 3:6) For of these are they that creep into houses, and take captive silly women laden with sins, led away by divers lusts,(7) ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

Silly women, always learning too much for their own good.

(Mark 4:11) And he said unto them, Unto you is given the mystery of the kingdom of God: but unto them that are without, all things are done in parables: (12) that seeing they may see, and not perceive; and hearing they may hear, and not understand; lest haply they should turn again, and it should be forgiven them.

Jesus is an arrogant asshole.

(1 Corinthians 10:9) Neither let us tempt the Lord, as some of them tempted, and perished by the serpents.

How do you tempt the Lord?

Oh man. I was just going to pull some of the verses I found interesting, but now that I'm looking at The Skeptic's Annotated Bible I see that there is no end to this. I give up. This is ridiculous.